Check It Out…

Ah, the restaurant check book, tool of the trade. It seems that I always carry one in my purse. I’m a waitress and that’s just how I roll. In fact, with my job, I have to be ready to come into work at a moments notice to cover a shift… any day, any time.

This leaves me with the responsibility of being prepared like a boy scout. I have frequently considered sleeping in my work clothes and installing a fireman’s pole just to be as quick and efficient as possible when I get the unexpected call to work, usually on my day off.

Over the years I have grown accustom to the spontaneity and dedication that it takes to pull this off. I have also told John that he may as well be in a relationship with a paramedic seeing that the over all disruption of plans and outcome is the same.

Tonight after working a double and getting out late, I met John at a sushi place that we haven’t been to in over a year.

The atmosphere is amazing and the food is great! I have to admit that I’ve missed dining there, but what can I say, the last time that we went was nothing short of a disaster.

It must be almost a year since we dined at Dao Fusion and our last visit was memorable, to say the least. The restaurant was inviting. We enjoyed some alone time in an intimate booth and ordered a bottle of wine.

Photo of Dao Fusion Cuisine & Lounge - Stratford, CT, United States. Tatami room

The food was delicious.

Photo of Dao Fusion Cuisine & Lounge - Stratford, CT, United States. Never disappoints! Love this sushi!

The service impeccable.

You may be wondering why we never went back after our fine dining experience one year ago.

Well, the answer could very well have landed both of us in jail…

After the waitress brought our bill and we were getting ready to leave, I began placing all of my belongings in my purse… my cell phone, car keys and sunglasses.

We walked to John’s car and got in. As John started the engine, I was startled by a noise… the waitress that served us was frantically banging on the window of the passenger seat where I sat.

I pressed the button on the door and slowly lowered the window, looking perplexed.

“You took the check book!” She yelled.

“What?” I asked, confused.

“You didn’t pay the bill!” She said, “You took the check book!”

Before I could reply John leaned over and said, “She’s a waitress.”

As if that explained it all.

“Look, I am a waitress and I have no idea what you’re talking about. I paid the bill and tipped generously.” I replied.

“I need my check book.” The waitress demanded.

Laughing I replied, “I don’t have your check book.”

As I opened my purse.

There in my purse sat two check books.

One from my work and one from the lunch that we had just enjoyed.

Slowly and sheepishly, I slid the cash filled check book through the open gap in the car window.

The waitress grabbed it and stamped off.

“Well, we’re NEVER going back there again.” I said to John.

We both laughed as my cheeks turned a bright shade of red.

But guess what?

We did, a year later… tonight, in fact.

I double and triple checked my purse as we paid the bill and just for the record, no one followed us out to our car.

Today maybe it’s just the small victories…

Or just my life…

I swear…





You Can’t Blog While Driving Around With An 80 Pound Pig

I’ve been eager to get back to my blog after working long hours all weekend. I’m a waitress, which doesn’t seem very exciting… unless you work where I work.

After a long Friday night shift, I was back at work at 6 a.m. the following day. By 7:20 a.m I was pulling a large truck around to the backside of a farm to pick up an 80 pound pig that my boss had ordered for a pig roast that we were catering.

I stepped out of the vehicle and was greeted by one of the workers.

I told him the name of the restaurant and repeated the details that I had committed to memory.

“I’m here to pick up an 80 pound pig, gutted, split and de hoofed.”

My stomach turned at the thought.

“You need a fig?” The worker replied.

What? I thought, confused.

“A pig.” I stated.

He nodded, turned and walked into the shadows of the barn.

I chuckled to myself, you would think that this guy would learn to pronounce the word pig, seeing that he worked at a pig farm.

He returned with a large sheet of brown paper and laid it across the length of the interior of the truck.

That was my cue, I quickly got back into the vehicle and sat in the driver’s seat. I couldn’t bear to see this dead pig.

When I heard the back doors of the truck slam closed, I started the engine and drove away.

I glanced in my rear view mirror… thankfully I couldn’t see a thing.

Although it was the early morning, the temperature was already rising as I rolled down the truck’s windows to let in some fresh air.

I thought about how I’d rather be writing than driving around on a hot day with a gutted pig on his way to meet his barbecued fate.

I knew that this busy weekend was going to leave me neglecting my blog.

Oh well, I thought, I can’t blog while I’m driving around with an 80 pound pig…

But I can certainly write about it later.






A Valentine’s Day Twist (As Told From the Perspective of Your Waitress)

I’ve worked in a restaurant most of my life. I enjoy people and serving the public. Doing so has helped me to develop amazing interpersonal skills and also an array of great stories. Through the years, Valentine’s Day has been a busy holiday and a standard couples night out.

Walking into any restaurant on Valentine’s Day, you’ll be sure to see tables filled with adorable couples, blissfully in love, sharing a bottle of wine. How romantic, right? Wait, maybe you’re not seeing the entire picture, like I am…your local waitress.

Allow me to give you the inside scoop…

Filet mignon, lobster tails, baked stuffed shrimp, rack of lamb, flowing drinks, roses and intimate conversation like this…

Table 2:

Me: “Here’s your appetizer,” as I set down the plate. “Jumbo shrimp cocktail.”

Wife to me: “Thank you.”

Wife to husband: “MY mother gave ME the money and if I want to buy a new ottoman, I’ll buy a new ottoman!”

Husband: Frowning, “Whatever you want dear.”

Oh boy, I think.

Table 3: 

Me: “Hi. Excuse me.”

Couple: No response

Nevermind, these two need to go and get a room, I think.

Table 1:

Husband: “Excuse me. Can I get another drink?”

Me: “Yes.” I reply, thinking that’s his third one.

Table 4:

Me: “Hi! Can I get you something to drink?”

Female guest: “Yes, a…glass of pinot grigio.”

Oh God. She’s crying, I say to myself.

It’s peak dinner time and the house is packed. I bring table 2 their entrees and they’re arguing. I return to table 4 and realize that his date has left as he places an order for himself, while looking embarrassed.

This night is a mess, I think. Well, it couldn’t possibly get any worse.

As I’m at the computer entering an order, the wife at table 1 gets up to use the lady’s room. Moments later I feel someone pulling at my apron near the side of my  waist.

Drunk guy from table 1: “Hey, beautiful! What are you doing later?”

This guy’s wife is in the lady’s room. You have got to be kidding me.

Valentine’s Day is full of hope and expectation of the perfect romantic evening, the perfect connection. In my perspective, you can’t conjure up that romance or that connection. Valentine’s Day isn’t about doing what’s expected or trying to show your love one night out of the year, it’s about celebrating your love every day of the year.

Whether you spend Valentine’s Day out at a fancy restaurant, or home in your pj’s eating chinese food and watching Netflix, give the one you love the best you have to offer…every single day.

Happy Valentine’s Day!


Your local waitress


What is your favorite Valentine’s Day story? Share it here.