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Why I Loath The Easter Bunny, Easter Baskets And Everything Pastel (Part 1)

Easter is just around the corner. I have friends that love Easter just about as much as they love Christmas. I am the polar opposite. I respect, enjoy and celebrate the religious meaning of Easter and all that it symbolizes… but I truly could do without the expensive Easter baskets full of sugary treats, the plastic toys (that only end up getting stepped on), the green Easter basket grass that can’t be vacuumed up (yet clings to everything) and the one random, colored egg that isn’t found until you open the fireplace for its seasonal debut. Oh, and did I mention that I abhor all of the decorating with pastel colors? Maybe it’s a reflection of my bold, outgoing personality but I love rich colors… pastels, not so much.

I loved Easter as a child and even as an adult, so I’m trying to pinpoint when I first started to dislike Easter. I guess it all started when Kevin was three years old and Eric (aka Rocky) was a baby. I was so excited about taking both of my adorable boys to the mall to have their photo with the Easter Bunny. For some reason the central part of the mall was under renovations that year and a trail of signs lead to the Easter Bunny’s new location in a vacant store.

As we entered through the one available door (both an entrance and an exit), I was relieved that there was no line. We were quickly greeted by one of the four assistants to the Easter Bunny. I smiled as I unbuckled Rocky from the stroller and grabbed Kevin’s hand explaining that they were going to get to meet the Easter Bunny and have their picture taken.

Kevin was so excited he climbed up the two steps that lead to the top of a small platform and sat right on the Easter Bunny’s left leg. That was easy, I thought, as I placed Rocky on the Easter Bunny’s opposite leg and moved out of the way for the photographer. As parents, we understand that with children there is only a small window of opportunity for a good photo. As parents, we also understand (but won’t openly admit) how badly we want this picture of our children to be perfect.

From where I stood on the floor, behind and to the left of the photographer, I could just tell that this was going to be one of those moments… one of those perfectly adorable shots. I secretly smiled my “victory” smile and held my breath as the photographer readied the camera. Hurry up I thought. Then I noticed Kevin looking down at the bunny’s feet, then up at his face and back down at his feet. Oh, please look at the camera, please smile, as I willed Kevin to remain still.

As the camera clicked, signaling the photo was taken, Kevin stood up and began yelling… “Wait a minute, you’re not the Easter Bunny – you’re a people!!!”

“I can see your ankles!” Kevin announced, while pointing at the exposed flesh showing from the gap in the material between the leg of the bunny’s costume and the beginning of the bunny’s feet.

“And I can see your eyes!” Kevin continued as he pointed at the bunny’s massive head and the human eyes visible behind the mask.

“You’re a people! You’re not the Easter Bunny!” Kevin bellowed, turning to address the people working there, as if they didn’t already know.

Rocky began to cry. I ran to retrieve him as I grabbed Kevin’s hand and pulled him off of the small platform. I glanced around nervously and noticed that a line was starting to form. I quickly approached the cashier and fumbled for my wallet.`

“He’s a people! He’s a people!” Kevin yelled.

“Kevin, that’s enough!” I said, “Please lower your voice.”

I grabbed my not so “perfect” Easter photo and managed to mutter an embarrassed “Thank you” to the staff as I strapped the baby in the stroller with one hand while holding onto the hand of  a flailing Kevin.

“He’s not the Easter Bunny! He’s a people!” Kevin yelled repeatedly, on a mission to blow the Easter Bunny’s cover and spread the word.

I kept my head down, only glancing up briefly as I headed towards the door. I had no choice but to pass the waiting crowd of parents and children in line to meet the Easter Bunny. The children looked confused and frightened. If the dirty looks that I was getting from the parents were any indication, they were pissed.

Needless to say, that was our last official visit to see the Easter Bunny and quite likely the beginning of my dislike of the Easter Holiday.

And if you think that was a funny yet embarrassing situation, wait until you read what happens in my next Easter post.  (Part 2) 

 

 

 

 

 

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Frozen Peas on My Knees

FINALLY got my computer back and I can now continue with my blog. In the interim, during my down time from blogging, I tore the ligaments in my right knee. Long story…which ended in me going to the hospital in an ambulance. As the paramedics were helping me out of my house and down a flight of steep stairs (in the pouring rain), my neighbor called the police because the ambulance was blocking the road. My life, I swear…

So while I sit in bed with a bag of frozen peas on my elevated knee, I bring you the continuation of my blog…

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10 Reasons That Single Moms Rock! (As told from my experiences as a single mom)

Let’s face it, single moms are resourceful. We are bonded by our ability to get things done and make things happen under the most limiting, seemingly impossible set of circumstances. This takes creativity, ingenuity, sacrifice and smarts. Now, I’m sure that you have respect for the single mom who works hard to provide for her family but I’m not sure that you can even begin to fathom just how savvy and determined we actually are. So let me be the first to give you the real inside scoop…

10 Reasons That Single Mom’s Rock:

  1. We’re not afraid to be alone – Contrary to popular belief, we are really okay with not being in a relationship…I’m not saying that having a relationship isn’t nice, but true to our hearts, our children come first.
  2. We find a way to provide our families most basic needs – It only takes one friend from school staying for a sleepover and one unpaid electric bill to equal, lesson learned. You can’t let the power get shut off ever again…plus using the excuse that a car must have hit a utility pole up the street only works once.
  3. We figure it out on our own – Sometimes the only way to have enough money to purchase the cleats for baseball is to scour through your closet looking for clothing  (that you got as gifts) with tags still on, hoping that you’ll be able to return them for cash. Been there, done that. Got the cleats.
  4. We lean on each other – Truth…We complain, we joke and sometimes we even cry but we lean on our other single mother friends for support when the going gets tough. There is always strength in numbers. 
  5. We take on the big challenges – Great. I have to purchase three laptops for school by the end of this week…PANIC…IMPOSSIBLE. “Don’t worry guys, mommy will get them for you.” After running around to a multitude of stores and realizing that you really can’t afford this, you end up at the local pawn shop. As fate would have it, not only do you find three affordable laptops, but there just happens to be a computer teacher from the high school there when you are. He resets all of the passwords and clears the memory on all of the laptops out of the kindness of his heart. Victory! Mom comes through, even if it took a day of running around and four hours at the pawn shop.
  6. We go without – Probably true of all moms but we single moms really put ourselves last. No vacation, no haircut every six weeks, no popular trends in clothing or fashion. If we don’t look good, know that we’re smiling because our children do. Sales, clearance, thrift stores…they only know that somehow mom got them what everyone else is wearing.
  7. We can turn nothing into something – It might be a recipe that becomes a family favorite created solely of “Whatever I have to work with” or a birthday or holiday that we make memorable on a shoestring budget…in retrospect we can’t even remember how we pulled it off, but we did.
  8. We find resources – Where there’s a will, there’s a way. Google it, inquire, seek it out. Somehow, someway, you can accomplish anything with a lot of drive and effort. 
  9. We understand the struggle is real – It ain’t easy! That’s the God’s honest truth and I challenge anyone who thinks that they can do a better job to come on over and hold the fort…but you have to come alone.
  10. We don’t give up – Being a single parent, male or female, isn’t for the faint of heart. In fact, it takes everything that you’ve got, everyday, and everything that you’ve got even on the days when you have no idea where you’re going to find the strength…but I do know this, I’ll never turn my back on the challenge. In the end it all comes down to love…and what better driving force is there than that.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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On the Eve of St. Patrick’s Day

On the eve of St. Patrick’s Day, I’m not feeling very festive even given my Irish descent. Fifteen years ago, St. Patrick’s Day 2002, I came very close to losing my youngest son, Marc. I think about it often, but this year for some reason, I’m feeling emotional enough that maybe it would help for me to “blog it out.”

Kevin was almost 6 years old at the time and he had been fighting a week-long bout with the flu. I brought Kevin to the pediatrician three times and was awake more of that week then I slept…taking care of Kevin, Eric (aka Rocky, then 2 1/2) and 6 week old, Marc.

Finally, at around 2:00 AM Kevin’s fever broke, as I poured warm water over his shoulder’s while he sat in a steamy bathtub. I thanked God, got Kevin dried, dressed and put him comfortably to bed. I checked on Eric, peacefully asleep in his lower bunk and pulled Marc’s bassinet closer to my bed as I fell, exhausted, into my own.

The morning of St.Patrick’s Day, Marc seemed fine and the day progressed in the normal chaotic fashion that I had become accustomed to. It wasn’t until Marc was fast asleep during his afternoon nap that I became concerned about his breathing…It didn’t sound right, so I called my pediatrician. The doctor asked me to hold the phone close to Marc in the bassinet so he could hear the baby breathing. When I moved the phone back to my ear, the doctor asked “Is his color good?”

“Yes.” I said

The doctor calmly replied “Take Marc to Yale New Haven Children’s Hospital right away.”

Although the doctor was calm and gave me no indication of what might be wrong with my baby, I could taste the panic in my throat. I called my parents and my mother-in-law, who were all immediately on their way. Hospital…someone has to watch the boys…grab the car seat…keys, keys…where the hell are the keys…everything started to whirl.

My ex-husband was strapping the base of the car seat into our vehicle as Marc sat smiling in the car seat carrier. Then, Marc began to turn blue. I quickly unstrapped him and ran into the house, my ex-husband followed, as I screamed to my mother-in-law to call 911.

I began performing CPR. Breath into his mouth…not working. Turn him over and hit him on the back. Turn him back over and press on his stomach, center under his ribs. Nothing was working. Marc went from blue, to purple, to black. I froze. I went into complete shock.  I remember glancing towards Kevin and Eric standing in the family room, observing all of it. I am sure that the fear on their faces mimicked the fear on mine.

My ex-husband flew out the front door and returned with our neighbor, Patrick Hayden, Captain of the Milford Fire Department. I met Pat at the door and handed him my baby. Pat immediately put his mouth over Marc’s, sucked in as hard as he could and spat on the hardwood floors. Marc still wasn’t breathing. Pat began performing CPR and it seemed hopeless as the time passed and Marc wasn’t revived. I jumped when the CPR momentarily stopped and the silence was broken as Pat yelled, “Call 911 back and tell them Pat Hayden said to step it up!” Marc suddenly gasped a small breath.

If I never understood the word surreal up to this point in my life, I did at that moment. The time was moving fast…moving slow…was it moving at all? Finally, a fire truck arrived with a rescue unit in the back, we climbed in and were on our way to the hospital.

Marc was admitted to the NICU (Newborn Intensive Care Unit). He was diagnosed with RSV (Respiratory Syncytial Virus) which is actually a form of the common cold but can be very dangerous in babies under six weeks old.

Within twenty minutes of getting Marc stabilized in the NICU, I got a call from my mother-in-law from the children’s wing of the same hospital. Kevin was admitted for pneumonia in one lung.

I guess this is the My Life I Swear Part…and an example of my ability to crack a joke at an inappropriate time…I can’t pick the winning lotto numbers but I can end up with two out of three children in the same hospital for five days.

Thank God both of my boys recovered. Thank God for my ex-husband’s presence of mind and for Pat Hayden. I am forever grateful.

I won’t ever let my mind go to the what could have happened, what could have been or the what ifs. I remind myself everyday how blessed I am…but especially on St. Patrick’s Day, I take some time to celebrate all of my beautiful sons and what they mean to me.

My apologizes to all of my Irish relatives and ancestors, I won’t be drinking to celebrate St. Patrick’s Day…but if you get a chance, raise your Guinness for me and say a toast for Pat Hayden and all of the amazing firefighters that save lives everyday yet think nothing of risking their own.

Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

Erin Cooper Reed

 

 

 

 

 

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Welcome to Kindergarten!

I remember it like it was yesterday…taking my first-born, Kevin, to his kindergarten entrance exam. I arrived on time with Kevin (5 years old) and my younger son, Eric (2 1/2 years old) in tow. Don’t be too impressed with my punctuality, the school was around the corner from our house. We filed out of the car and as I swung Eric into position on my right hip, I was struck with a wave of nervousness. I knew that Kevin was smart but I had no idea what they were going to ask him in the interview. I said a quick prayer that Kevin would pass the kindergarten entrance exam and headed towards the front doors of the elementary school.

Once inside, introductions were exchanged and Kevin was seated at a long table across from two teachers. Things started out well. The teachers handed Kevin a piece of paper, a pencil and some crayons.

A pleasant dark-haired teacher asked Kevin to write his name. Kevin followed her instruction and wrote his first and last name on the bottom of the paper. I beamed with pride.

Eric was already starting to get fidgety, as I pulled on his arm to try to get him to sit down. Before we left the house Eric had insisted on wearing a Superman t-shirt with an attached cape, a purchase we had made at Six Flags that summer. It hadn’t dawned on me when I dressed Eric that morning, but he had the full intention of getting his Superman cape to fly behind him and began circling the table in the small room.

The teacher moved the crayons towards Kevin and asked him to draw any picture he wanted. As Kevin went to work detailing a beautiful picture of a train, I chased Eric around the table trying to get him to be still. Glancing back at Kevin engrossed in his drawing, I tried to no avail to ward off his brother’s Superman distraction.

“Don’t worry.” the teacher stated, “The baby is fine. We’re almost done here.”

I tried to force a smile while I worried that all of the commotion had resulted in ending Kevin’s interview earlier than it should have. I quickly got back to Kevin’s side as the second teacher asked Kevin, “So, what is your brother’s name?”

Kevin sat quietly for a moment then took the crayon and wrote a large “E” in the upper right side of the paper. The “E” was backwards and I had to stop myself from saying “NO” out loud.

Kevin continued and wrote Eric’s named completely backwards and upside, right to left. I held my breath for a moment before I realized that Kevin had written Eric, mirror image and upside down, so it was facing the teachers and easy for them to read.

Both of the teacher’s mouths dropped open as Kevin slowly slid the paper across the desk toward the teachers and said, “That’s my brother’s name.”

I was still in shock as we walked out to our car.

I said to Kevin, “Buddy, that was really cool what you did with your brother’s name.”

Kevin shook his head yes and just replied a simple “Ya.”

Kevin. My film maker, my writer, my radio talent, actor, voice over guy…my rapper. There has always been something special and unique about my first-born son. I knew it when he was young and I know it now.

I love you Kevin and I can’t wait to see what you do with all of the amazing gifts that you have been blessed with. You make me proud everyday.

 

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The Versatile Blogger Award

March 14,2017  Mylifeiswear.com

I am so excited to be nominated for the Versatile Blogger Award! It really feels good to have my little blog get some recognition. Thank you to The Artist of Dreams for nominating me. Check out The Artist of Dreams at theartistofdreams.wordpress.com to see some really beautiful artwork and great talent.

The Rules:

If you are nominated, you’ve been awarded the Versatile Blogger award.

  •  Thank the person who gave you this award. That’s common courtesy.
  •  Include a link to their blog. That’s also common courtesy — if you can figure out how to do it.
  •  Next, select 15 blogs/bloggers that you’ve recently discovered or follow regularly. ( I would add, pick blogs or bloggers that are excellent!)
  •  Nominate those 15 bloggers for the Versatile Blogger Award — you might include a link to this site.
  •  Finally, tell the person who nominated you 7 things about yourself.

 

Nominations:

this tiny blue house  https://thistinybluehouse.com/

HOUSTON PHOTO JOURNEY  https://houstonphotojourney.wordpress.com/

The Local Nag   https://thelocalnag.com/

The Little Mermaid  https://thelittlemermaid09.wordpress.com/

Seven Things About Me:

  1. I love to write! I began writing when I left an abusive marriage in 2010. My writing took on a life of its own and I ended up writing for six domestic violence organizations and the Charlotte Court System while living down south.
  2. I love public speaking. I spoke at “Walk A Mile in Her Shoes” for two consecutive years. I also gave a speech at “Speaking of Women 2014” in front of an audience of 500 people.
  3. My children used to tell me, “Mom, no one cares what you have to say.” in reference to my writing. Over the years they have changed their tune and even support and encourage my efforts.
  4. I wouldn’t be able to survive without my sense of humor. My life is by no means easy, yet I find a reason to laugh everyday.
  5. I am well aware that there is no one that is tougher on me than I am on myself. I often find myself asking,  “Why didn’t I do more? How could I have done better?” I’m still not sure if this line of thinking is detrimental or inspiring to my overall goals. I’ll let you know when I figure that out.
  6. I never get writer’s block. My mind is always whirling with ideas and there are many times (Like when I’m in the shower) that I wish I had a pen and paper.
  7. If I could do anything for a living, I’d love to earn money writing…in the meantime, writing is a great outlet for me and I love sharing myself and my thoughts with the world.

 

Thank you again for the VBA (Versatile Blogger Award)! I am honored and look forward to blogging my butt off in the future!

Best,                                                               

Erin Cooper Reed

 

 

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“I Tasted It With My Eyes And I Don’t Like It”

What is it about kids and food? They love it, they hate it. It makes them giggle with joy and anticipation, it makes them cry. There is nothing more frustrating than worrying about what your child does or doesn’t eat, or how much. When my son Eric (aka Rocky) was an infant he was such a picky eater, that every time I gave him baby food he would throw it up on his high chair tray. My concerned mother offered to babysit him and took the opportunity to puree all of his vegetables straight from the garden. Ultimately, he threw them all up on the high chair tray too. When Eric was a toddler he only ate graham crackers. We stocked the pantry full until, one day, he shook his head “No” to graham crackers. That was the beginning of the long list of the only “one food” that my child would eat until he became sick of it. I don’t get it but I have learned that it will all turn out okay in the long run. So for a few moments, put aside the incessant worry that your child isn’t eating enough of the right things or getting the proper nutrition and embrace the crazy ride.

Did you ever buy something just because you had a coupon? When Marc was four years old I picked up a bag of Tyson frozen Any’Tizers: Chicken Cordon Bleu…they came in a small appetizer ball, easy to eat. I followed the instructions, heated them up and served them as a side with our family dinner. Needless to say they were a big hit! Marc announced at the dinner table, “Can I have some more blue balls? I LOVE blue balls!”

Good for you, Marc. I’ll check back with you in twenty years on that statement. Enough said.

Eric would only eat spaghetti…any other kind of pasta became a negotiation…”But Eric, penne pasta is spaghetti’s cousin…” all to no avail. Eric only liked spaghetti. One day at my parents house, my mom made stuffed shells for dinner. She thought nothing of reaching over to cut Eric’s stuffed shells in half so they would be easier for him to eat. Once Eric saw the ricotta cheese inside, he was mentally done with the meal before he even started.

“Eric, eat your dinner.” my father stated

“No.” Eric replied

“Why won’t you eat it?” my father asked

Eric said, “Because I don’t like it.”

“How do you know you don’t like it if you haven’t even tried it?” my father inquired

Eric replied, “Well, I tasted it with my eyes Papa, and I know I don’t like it.”

Maybe we’ll never understand what is inside of the mind of a child when it comes to food. What I have learned is to take it all in stride and laugh out loud when the situation presents itself…before you know it you will be shopping for and feeding a teenager that lives to work out and consumes a protien only diet.

Can I interest you in a Chicken Cordon Bleu Ball…I have a coupon?

 

 

 

 

 

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Another New England Snow Storm

All of your friends in other states are laughing as they send photos of the beach and sunny skies. Part of you says, wouldn’t that be nice? What are we doing here, still in New England? You know you dread the frigid temperatures, the shoveling, the treacherous roads…

Yet, deep in your heart you secretly love the snow day. You loved it as a child and you embrace it as an adult… the unexpected, random day off, the silenced alarm clock, the weight of the warm covers and the chance to sleep in.

You’ve done the footwork, watched the weather channel, grocery shopped for what seems like a months worth of meals in preparation and Googled the school closings. Yes, there is shoveling to do but the beauty of the snow glistening on the barren tree branches takes your breath away as your hands clasp your steamy cup of morning coffee.

Your kids are so excited that they race outside laughing and playing, light of heart, while your dog barks with a snow-capped nose as he chases after them. Without a doubt, a huge pile of wet clothes, hats and mittens form on the floor next to the dryer…only to be ignored due to the hot chocolate topped with whip cream and a batch of warm toll house cookies straight from the oven.

A lazy day…

A fire…

A board game…

A nap…

A snuggle…

A long conversation…

A family movie…

Whatever it is that makes your snow day special, have no doubt that it IS SPECIAL. It is all of these things that make beautiful memories. It is also one of the many things that I love about being a New Englander.

In fact, I wouldn’t trade it for the hottest beach or the sunniest sky.

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Ten Things It Took Me 50 Years To Figure Out…

So today is my 50th birthday. Fifty. Holy shit! I’d certainly rather be 25 twice and I’m pretty sure that in my mind I’m infinitely 23…but here I am 50. So what has all this time here on earth taught me and how am I a better woman than I was at 23 or 25? If I had to break it down into just ten things, I’d have to go with the following insights.

  1. Life is a roller coaster   Be sure to fasten your seat belt and keep your hands in the cart at all times because as sure as there’s an up, there’s going to be a down. Don’t panic, hold on tight around the sharp curves and enjoy the ride. Everything always works out in the long run. 
  2. Choose your battles   Some things just aren’t worth the drain that they cause on your energy and time. It isn’t always important to be right. Respect that everyone is different with their own set of ideas and values. That is what makes each of us special and unique.
  3. Don’t worry about keeping up with the Jones    It doesn’t matter…In fact none of it matters. All the material things in the world won’t make you happy. Don’t compare yourself to others. Focus on your own inner happiness and you will in turn enjoy a happy life.
  4. Don’t forget to smile   Don’t let the challenges of life get you down. A smile and a positive attitude never cease to create magic even during difficult times. Remember, “You’re never fully dressed without a smile.”
  5. Count your blessings  Take time to be thankful for all of the things that we all take for granted so easily. Enough said.
  6. Follow your intuition  You innately know what to do, where to go next and how to handle whatever life throws at you. Take time to pray, meditate and connect with your sources energy. It will never steer you wrong.
  7. Live in the moment  You can’t change the past. Everything in life happens for a reason so you might as well chalk it up as a learning experience that played a key role in who you have become today. Don’t wish your life away thinking that you’ll be happy when…you finally achieve a goal or get to where you ultimately want to be. Living in the past or living for the future steals your experience in the right now. Learn to live in the now.
  8. Make time for yourself  Learn to be okay with being alone. Love yourself as you are and fuel your passions. Do what makes you happy and brings you inner peace and joy.
  9. Love and family are all that matters  When all is said and done, what it all really comes down to is love and family. Make love and family a priority in your life and you’ll live with no regrets. Everything else is secondary.
  10. Don’t ever lose your sense of humor   I don’t think I would have survived all that I’ve been through to date without a sense of humor. Having the ability to laugh, not only at yourself, but at all of the crazy thing that life brings is a true talent and a gift. Finding humor in the bleakest times can turn a difficult situation into a small bump in the road.