When I was pregnant with my third child, I experienced several very bizarre interactions with complete strangers. As I waddled around the mall or local supermarket with a protruding belly and two boys in tow, a woman approached me and said, “I see that you have your hands full. Just wait.” Then she walked away.

Odd. “What the hell was that all about?” I thought.

I didn’t pay her any mind and chalked her up as a person who was a bit tainted.

Not long after, on a similar shopping trip, my slow pregnant self, chasing after 2 active boys in public turned into another unbelievable encounter. “Wait. You’re going to  be really outnumbered,” a strange woman said with a laugh and walked away.

Seriously. What is going on and why are strangers voicing their opinions to me? I thought as my tolerance wavered.

If all of that wasn’t weird enough, on yet another excursion, a woman approached me and said out of nowhere, “The third one is the one that will put you over the edge.”

I had completely lost my patience for other people’s opinions and quite frankly, I was starting to get pissed off.

How rude! I thought.

Who in the hell do these people think they are to comment on how many children I have or what having 3 children would be like?

Little did I know…

It wasn’t easy getting three kids dressed and in the car for Marc’s newborn visit at the pediatrician. Actually, truth be told, I felt like I had already run a 5k and just for the record, I looked like it. Finally, I had the baby, Marc, Kevin (5 1/2 years old and Eric 2 1/2 years old) strapped in and ready to go.  

We arrived at the pediatrician’s office ten minutes late. Not bad, considering that Marc pooped after being fastened in the baby carrier and Eric had completely undressed himself while I changed Marc’s diaper. Kevin insisted on bringing all of the X-men figures ( two of which were lost under the sofa). Nevertheless, I did it. I had gotten all three boys to the doctor’s office for Marc’s 6 week check up. Victory!

I managed to get the baby, the diaper bag, Kevin, Eric and all of the X-Men safely into the waiting area. I was already exhausted, not to mention hungry, and hoping to get this over as soon as humanly possible.

Thank God the baby was fast asleep from the car ride and that Eric only screamed for a minute as I pulled him off the chair near the fish tank as they called Marc’s name.

Once in the examination room, the nurse asked me to undress Marc and lie him on the scale so that she could get his weight.

As soon as Marc’s naked flesh hit the cold metal scale he screamed. As soon as Marc screamed, Eric began to cry.

Suddenly, the lights went off. I couldn’t see my screaming 6 week old son on the scale. The nurse had spotted Kevin near the light switch before the lights had gone out and yelled, “Turn the lights back on!”

Eric screamed louder.

Unable to move from the baby on the scale, I understood that the nurse was yelling because Kevin had turned the lights out.

The lights flicked on for a brief moment, then out again. I saw Kevin’s tiny hand on the light switch. “Kevin, turn the lights back on!” I yelled, while Eric and the baby screamed in fear.

I jumped as the nurse yelled at the top of her lungs, “Turn the lights on now!”

Finally, the doctor entered, flipped the lights on and asked the nurse to step outside.

Oh God, all of the screaming. She’s going to get fired, I thought.

The doctor entered and completed Marc’s entire exam. At the end he turned to me and said, “Ma’am, I think it would be better if you only brought your children in for a visit one at a time.”

I nodded in embarrassment as he handed me the paper with Marc’s height and weight on it.

As we were walking to the desk to schedule Marc’s next appointment, I pulled Kevin aside.

“Kevin, you could have gotten that nurse fired. Why, when mommy and the nurse were yelling to turn on the light…why didn’t you listen, why didn’t you turn on the light?” I asked.

With his head down, Kevin replied, ” Mommy, when the kids aren’t being quiet at school, my teacher always turns off the light.”

So maybe I do have my hands full. Maybe I am outnumbered… Or maybe the third one just put me over the edge…

But I just think that three’s a crowd…well at least at the doctor’s office.


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